My Childhood Friend Came to Visit – She Chose Not to Have Children, Wanted to Live for Herself, and Now at 60, She Has No Regrets About Her Life Choices

Today I met up with my childhood friend. Shes sixty now, just like me. After we finished university, she packed up her things almost overnight and left our little town. For a while, we wrote each other letters, but eventually, even that faded away.

It was only through mutual acquaintances that I heard what shed been up to. It turned out that she was always on the go, travelling wherever she pleased, never one to settle down. She was married three times by the age of fifty and yet, none of the marriages lasted. She never had children. I always found that a bit odd, really. Most women I knew had children, and even if they split with their partners, at least they had a family, someone to care for, grandchildren to dote on.

And so, here she is, back in our sleepy little Hampshire village, sorting out the last of her belongings so she could sell them. Shed been renting out her old flat for years, apparently.

We met in an old café on the high street. We reminisced about school days, our families, how our lives had turned out. I couldnt help but ask her the question that had always lingered in my mind:

Emily, why did your life take such a different path? Why no children at all? Not even for yourself, so youd have someone to bring you a cuppa when youre old?

She burst out laughing and looked me square in the eye. A cuppa? Do you really think your children will be at your beck and call, bringing you tea when youre old? Most grown children are too busy they dont fuss over their parents these days. Honestly, it’s far better to put a bit aside and pay for a good carer, rather than counting on your children and weighing them down with guilt.

She carried on, I never had children because I didnt want to. Ive got no urge to fuss over someone else for the rest of my days, to worry endlessly, or to hand out my savings right and left. I chose to live life for myself, travel, make money, see the world. My husbands left me simply because I refused the idea of having kids.

Even now, I live exactly as I please. No grandchildren to look after, no reason to stretch my pension to feed grown-up children who cant support themselves.

So, Ive no regrets. If anything, I pity those with brood after brood of children, who now spend their days alone and blame their children for leaving or moving abroad. I dont have any of those problems. Thats how I see it.

After listening to her, I understood she had a point. Why bring children into the world just to follow some unwritten rule? Why fret and hope for a return on something youre not sure you ever wanted in the first place? Why expect that if I had a child, theyd automatically look after me when Im old?

It makes you think, doesnt it?