You stay home with the kids. I’m going alone to my brother’s wedding.

My husband came home from work yesterday in a strange mood, as if he’d just returned from some distant place between the clouds and the pavement.

I asked him about the upcoming wedding, and he immediately dropped his gaze to his shoes. He muttered that hed be going to the wedding alone.

“But what about me?” I stammered, genuinely surprised.

My husband replied, Love, January was a dead month for wages. Ill probably just go on my own. You stay with our daughter. Nothing bad will happen. Ill be gone three days, have to stay at a hotel and eat something. And, of course, theres the gift for the bride and groom.

We were still newlyweds ourselves, living in a single-bedroom flat in Manchester. My mother-in-law had given us the place, like a quirky blessing wrapped in bricks and mortar. I was on maternity leave. Our daughter, nearly two, was drawn to mysterious corners and quiet dreams. Id not rushed back to work, no one to leave her with. My in-laws lent us the flat, so as they saybless them for that.

My mum took care of herself. She picked up extra shifts, dashed through her evenings like a fox in the suburbs. Shed made it clear: if I desperately needed childcare to return to work, shed be there. But buying a new dress or dyeing my hair was out of the questionshe wouldnt help if it meant vanity. Typical of her, really. She flies abroad every year, and all her weekends vanish in beauty parlours and spa retreats.

Life in our family was oddly calm. When my husband was home, I could slip away for errands or a breath of fresh airthough he wasnt keen and let me out only rarely, and never for long.

And then came the wedding invitation.

My husbands younger brother was getting married. Wed need to travel to another cityLeeds, perhapsfor three days. I went to my mum, pleading with her to watch her granddaughter. After all, a wedding is a peculiar rite, only three days, and our daughter is a gentle soulnot prone to cries or tantrums.

Mum protested fiercely, then sighed and took three days off work. I was elateda small freedom after two years in the cocoon of childcare. At the wedding, Id finally have a moment of rest.

But my reverie shattered when my husband made his announcement.

This was supposed to be an important event. Id nursed our child for a year, almost never leaving the house. No one wanted to babysit hernot my mum, not my in-laws. Meanwhile, my husband attended company events and business trips, traipsing through strange towns.

To be honest, I barely knew his brother. Id only seen his fiancée in a faded photograph.

Utter disappointment washed over me. My husband didnt understand. He thought everything was perfectly fine.

Listen, darling, your mum isnt thrilled about having our daughter over. Let her rest those days, and you stay home. Why make her uncomfortable? If she doesnt want to babysit, then she shouldnt. And you dont really know my family. Whats the point for you? Your job is to stay at home, mind our girl. Ill go and return.

So I decidedno one would be going anywhere. Why should my husband decide what I should do?

But who do you think is right here?

Personally, I find both the mother and the husband rather cheeky. Of course, a grandma has no obligation to babysit. But surely she could think of her daughter as well, not just herself.

And the husband isnt understanding his wife at all. Shes devoted so much to their daughter. She needs a break, even if only now and then.

He ought to see if he truly cares for her

The woman in this surreal situation is profoundly sadcaught in a dream she cant awake from. Shes entirely dependent on her husband, with no one to help her.

It would be intriguing to hear what readers have to say. Perhaps shell find a way to solve this problem and finally tell her husband what she thinks.

Ladies, dont forget, we live in a country where you can speak your mind! Nothing dreadful will happen for voicing your opinion. Its not as if your husband will storm off demanding a divorce just because you set a boundary. And even if he didthat would reveal the truth about his feelings. Its important to respect each other and share happiness.