“My mum doesn’t like beige, you know that.” “But your mum does love free repairs,” Sarah replied.

Ill order the purple wallpaper, John told his wife.
You do see it doesnt match the colour of the floorboards, right? Surely cream would look far better.
My mother cant stand cream, you know that.
Well, your mother rather enjoys a free renovation, replied Alice.

Johns mother had once hinted how wonderful it would be to have her house done up a bit. Alice hadnt said anything. But John seemed keen on doing it after all, she was his mother. Alice didnt agree with the idea, but held her tongue.

After all, it wasnt her concern. If John felt he ought to do it, let him get on with it. His mother made it perfectly clear she cared only for the outcome, not the effort. No thank yous, just a detailed wishlist.
Alice, its not a free renovation, its your son doing it for you, John assured her.
Of course it is.

Of course it is. His mother loved anything that came free, which she reminded John of constantly. If she disliked something, you could be sure it would be redone. Alice was right. When the decorating was finally over, and Johns mother returned, she took one look around:

Its all very poor. The wallpaper is nothing like I envisioned. The kitchens no good, either. And what on earth are these cupboards? Everythings so shoddily done Ive no words. I almost want to take you to court.
And whom would you sue? Your own son, whos spent his own money on it all?
Oh, Alice. Im only jesting.

Truth be told, my mother-in-law was not in the best of humours. Shed been hoping for something grand and expensive, yet had to settle for an ordinary sort of job. It was all new and tidy, but I expect not nearly as dear as shed hoped. Which was likely why she didnt care for it. John and I were hardly wealthy enough for a lavish refurbishment; wed done what we could, yet she never even thanked us.
Alice, I dont think Mums very pleased with the work, John confided one evening.
She never is! Is your mother ever pleased with anything?
She wanted something better
Look, we dont have that kind of money.
Cant we get a loan? his mother chimed in.

I was quite sure she hadnt heard a word wed said. For her, of course, John would have borrowed, maybe even begged and scraped. Hed have repaid promptly. Perhaps hed have thrown in a few extra pounds for good measure. But I felt things had already gone too far. John spoke before I could:
Mum, what talk of loans? You know how I feel about all that. Especially just to redo the kitchen. Its all nicely done, in very good taste. What more do you want?
At the very least, the kitchen should be redone. And out she swept.

John, I think your mothers past caring whats proper, I said.
Alice, you know what shes like. Shes always been difficult.

The hardware shop was bustling. I stood with a new tablecloth over my arm, while John carried a box of taps. It didnt seem wed bought much, but the bill always ended up frightfully high. So it went on and on. Perhaps it would never end.

Suddenly, I stopped in my tracks.
You said wed no more money for the house.
Youre right. We had to borrow a little.
Ive had enough! I plopped the tablecloth back onto the shelf. Let someone else have it, if they wanted. Wed done quite enough for his mother. Borrowing for her sake? That went well beyond the mark.
Dont you dare argue with me! I snapped, making for the door.
John followed me out. You see, even for ones own mother, it was probably high time to draw the line.