I Don’t Want to Invite My Parents to My Wedding

My fiancée, Charlotte, and I are deeply in love. Were both twenty years old. Weve been friends since we were in Year 4, and by Year 6 we were already a couple. At a young age, we had a son.

Naturally, that wasnt exactly what our parents had hoped for us, but it happened. Our son is absolutely precious to us! Today, he turns three. We have our own flat, and Ive made up my mind to marry Charlotte.

We sent invitations out to around a hundred people for our wedding. The majority are relatives from all corners of England. Were not especially close to many, but it feels wrong not to bring everyone together for such a special occasion.

Ever since we shared the news about our wedding, my mums been trying to persuade us not to bring our son, but to leave him with a childminder.

She keeps saying we should think about whats best for him, about his comfort, and spare the guests from any hassle. Everyone wants to enjoy themselves and let their hair down, and keeping an eye on a young child is hard work. You wont have any time for yourselves, she says. Hes still too littlehe wont understand whats going on.

Charlotte and I are the only ones convinced that our son should be part of such a meaningful moment in our lives. Well never have this day again. My aunt, Mums sister, kindly agreed to watch over our son during the ceremony, so theres no cause for concern. The family can relax and enjoy the day.

Its only my mum whos acting oddly, fretting and complaining that our son should stay away from the wedding. After a while, I understood her real reason for resisting having her grandson present.

It turned out my parents had made a pact not to let anyone know about our child. Now, theyre struggling with how to explain him to the rest of the family. Theyre ashamed the truth will come out.

Mum says shed be mortified if people found out Id fathered a child before marrying Charlotte. Not many people become parents at such a young age. She fears people will gossip, maybe even laugh. No need to reveal that secret, she insists.

Really, I think Mum worries more about how her relatives will judge her behaviour. Her siblings occasionally keep in touch, but nobody has any idea.

I was absolutely furious with her. She, meanwhile, grew angry with me.

Now it all feels uncomfortable, as if weve done something illicit by simply becoming parents. Ive discussed it with my parents repeatedly. My decision stands, and they hold on to theirs.

Sadly, those closest to us havent been supportive. Mum keeps telling me that if I dont listen to her, shell stop considering me her son. Never in my life did I imagine it would come to this.