Although Lucia Was a Wonderful Daughter-in-Law and Wife, She Ended Up Destroying Not Only Her Marriage but Also Herself

Lucy was an orphan and grew up in a children’s home in Manchester. At eighteen, she married without really understanding what it meant to be a wife or part of a family, since shed never had friends who were married. When she moved into her husbands flat, she eagerly absorbed everything about how to be the perfect wife, relying heavily on her mother-in-law for guidance.

Lucy had often heard tales of difficult mothers-in-law, but she still believed that, since she never had a mother of her own, her husbands mother would fill that role and wish her well. In truth, her mother-in-law didnt actually intend any harm, but somehow things didnt go quite as Lucy imagined. Her mother-in-law enthusiastically took it upon herself to teach Lucy all the rules of family life, declaring at one point, If your husband is unfaithful, its your fault as his wife.

Why? Lucy had always assumed that the one who chose to cheat was guilty. Yet she was told otherwise: a wife is to blame for her husbands infidelity, simply because she must have neglected herself and stopped being attractive to him. Her mother-in-law advised Lucy to keep a slim waist well into old age. Dutifully, Lucy noted it in her diaryDont gain weightand joined a fitness club.

Lucy was already slim and healthy, but, worried about becoming overweight, she started losing even more weight. Once shed accomplished this, her mother-in-law offered another nugget of wisdom: In a proper family, both husband and wife work.

Lucy didnt protest, since she herself wanted to work. She was ready for any job. When she inquired about the expectations during maternity leave, her mother-in-law replied, Thats your problem and up to you to sort!

Lucy didnt write that one down, but a few years after marrying, she found herself working part-time as a childminder while on maternity leave. She was content, but her husband and mother-in-law began berating her for earning little.

Lucy decided it wouldnt be a big issue if she used her own money for the hairdresser, but that was met with yet another piece of advice: When youre on maternity leave, you dont need to dress up! When youre back at work, you can get your hair done and put on makeup, but now, you should save money!

Lucy used to give all her earnings to her husband. Throughout their years of marriage, her mother-in-laws advice loomed large: A good wife can do all the housework herself!

So that was how things went; Lucy did everything alone. Sometimes she would collapse from exhaustion, but still managed to keep up. Fainting became a daily occurrence. Often, after settling the youngest child at nine oclock in the evening, shed tidy up and prepare meals for the next day, while her husband was already on his tenth nap, worn out from earning money.

It was no surprise that Lucy ended up in hospital. She never had time to attend to random aches and pains, never noticed the onset of a serious illness. She stayed there for over two weeks, and neither her husband nor mother-in-law visited her once. Fortunately, Lucy had her phone and could call her friend, who brought her everything she needed. Upon discharge, she immediately filed for divorce.

Lucys story reminds us that sometimes, striving too hard to please others and follow their expectations, we can lose ourselves. In life, its important to recognise your worth and listen to your own needsbecause self-respect is the foundation for true happiness.